About Me

Part 1: 

At age nine, I was told I wouldn’t be able to run if I continued my active, athletic lifestyle. Despite consistently hearing professionals give the same advice for seven years to “quit now before you lose the ability to run”, “there are no solutions to your condition”, and my favorite, “give up”, it never stopped me in pursuit of my goals. Although that sounds depressing for a child to hear professionals advising one to quit sports, it was a blessing for me; I developed the creative confidence to create a solution to heal and found a passion through my suffering for serving others through fitness. 

The start of my challenging fitness journey began when I was first diagnosed with severe Osgood-Schlatters. As described earlier, doctors didn’t know how to solve my chronic knee pain and told me to quit sports once their recovery programs were ineffective. The pattern of taking time off, going to physical therapy, getting re-diagnosed with some new condition, and then repeatedly hearing their quitter’s advice became exhausting and broke my heart. 

Around age 12, I developed a bakers cyst on the back of my left knee. This cyst led to me being pulled out of my second period middle school health class to go directly into an emergency picc line procedure, followed by another emergency knee surgery the next morning. Why the unexpected surgeries? My knee doctor discovered there was bacteria in my leg eating away at my cartilage, causing bone on bone grinding, and consequently causing the pain and the cyst. Following the second surgery, I woke up with tubes coming out of my knee, in pain, and was told I would be in a wheelchair for at least two weeks. 

Three days later, my tubes were taken out, and I was walking with a cane, despite being told I wouldn’t be able to. Below is a very unattractive picture of myself walking for the first time post surgery. 

For follow ups with my doctor, my mom had to bribe me with chocolate shakes from Mikies in Everett to even get me into the car to see the ‘evil’ doctor who put me through what my 12 year old mindset deemed as Hell. To help me recover from such an extensive surgery, I asked my soccer coach to move me down to the B team so I could work on my skills and fitness at a slower pace. Additionally, my mom encouraged me with money to start CrossFit to regain my strength back.

The combination of playing at a lower level and training at CrossFit Advantage allowed me to regain my strength and endurance to play soccer for the next two years while wearing knee braces, KT tape, and following my PT program. Despite the successful surgery, I still had sharp knee pain in both my knees. Doctor after doctor repeatedly advised me to quit soccer. This only drove me to keep working. My mom kept searching for new specialists who could help me, varying from psychics, acupuncture, energy healers, etc. Despite not feeling relief, I still became the fittest player on the soccer field from going to CrossFit, and earned my place as starter and captain of the B team. Even though I was still in pain, I was excited to move back up to my old team and be challenged even further. 

Before the start of my freshman year of high school, my pain levels in my knees intensified, to the point I was unable to walk without severe pain in my knees and unable to play any sports. Just getting out of bed in the mornings was a challenge. I was a depressed teen who was sick of the pain and tired of hearing I had no future in athletics due to having zero control over my body. One day after school, I was crying on our leather couch, feeling sorry for myself and even questioning my own existence since I didn’t have the freedom to be an athlete. My mom stepped in, and told me exactly what I needed to hear: to stop pitying myself and do something about my pain. Instantly, I was angry with her words; I had followed every doctor’s orders and did everything right, yet I was still just a teenager who no one could help. I deserved to feel defeated and lost. Although I felt offended, her words were what pushed me on the right path to heal. It was at this moment with my mom that I finally realized no one can help me, but myself. I took action, cut contact with all doctors, and committed to my own plan to heal. I have my mom to thank for her constant support, endless effort, and unconditional love that gave me strength to keep moving forward.

My doctors couldn’t solve my chronic knee pain, but I believed I could. To begin my recovery, I conducted research on the best diets and the best exercises for overcoming chronic knee pain. My research led me to following my own personalized recovery program for a full year, which included strictly following the Paleo diet plus stretching and performing physical therapy exercises for 90 minutes each day. In addition to my recovery program, I followed a program my brother created to rebuild my mental strength, fitness, and technical skills. Together, the two programs helped me reach my goal of re-earning the position as a starter on the Nationals A team in May of 2015. I finally reached success after seven years of pain. I defied all doctors and healed myself. I reached success when I was told to give up and expected to fail. 

Yet this seven year battle was just part one of my challenging fitness journey. 

Part 2: 

Eight months into my first pain-free season with the Nationals A team, I endured two stacked concussions and had to take three months off to recover, only to get back on the field and endure more. The Seattle Children’s Concussion Specialist told me if I continued playing, the next concussion may lead to memory loss, speech issues, and permanent damage. Not willing to risk my entire future, I quit playing the sport I fell in love with. 

I had worked so hard for the past seven years to regain my identity as an athlete and have the freedom to play soccer. Yet I lost it all in less than a year after reaching my goal of being pain-free. Despite this heartbreak, it opened up a new door; becoming a CrossFit coach. My head coach, Cody Looney, took me under his wing and mentored me. Cody set me up for success to earn my Level One, co-found Wolfpack Power (a teen’s CrossFit program), PilotFit (the University of Portland’s first CrossFit class), UpLift (the University of Portland’s women’s weightlifting club), as well as start Alpha, my own six week program for women and teens. I quickly fell in love with serving others through fitness. 

Part 3:

Before I started my sophomore year of college, I finally felt strong and complete. I had my identity back as an athlete and I was helping others reach their fitness goals. In August, before I left for school, I vowed to myself I would never get injured again and do everything in my power to ensure that. I never wanted to lose my freedom to perform as an athlete again. Yet my goal was crushed just one month later. 

September 21st, 2018, 11:43 AM. I was hit by a distracted Lyft driver. Upon impact, my head hit the window and I was knocked out for about 10 seconds before I woke up in my car, facing oncoming traffic in their lane. I didn’t know what had happened until I saw my mirror missing on my passenger side and anger surged up inside of me. I had been driving for just 30 seconds and this distracted driver irresponsibly hit me. I immediately moved my car to get out of the oncoming lane with the little strength I had left and called my mom, 911 and then my friend, Megan Elling. Over the phone, I told Meg that “a bitch just hit me, and I need help”. She came running, thinking I got into a fist fight with a chick and needed backup! Little did I know that this car accident would bring me the blessing of becoming best friends with Megan Elling, who was my lifesaver that day. At the scene, Meg missed her classes to stay by my side, called my insurance, and talked to the police and medics for me. She even took me to the Urgent Care and helped me talk to them as I was in such shock and pain, I didn’t understand what anyone was saying. 

The day of the car accident was supposed to be the first house party at the Babe Cave to celebrate my birthday. It would have been such a fun night, yet I had a pounding headache, and my face, jaw, neck, shoulders, back, and right hip were all throbbing and swollen. I was so wiped out from the trauma. Despite this, I still attempted to go to class on Monday, only to experience shock as I felt my finance professor wasn’t speaking English, felt nauseas, and had the worst headache. It hit me then that I had endured a concussion from the accident. My body and mind went into instant panic. I quit the sport I loved to avoid enduring another concussion and here I was, scared as hell that I might suffer permanent damage. I immediately went home and Seattle Children’s tested me for a concussion. I was praying that I would pass or that it was only a minor one. I felt confident going into the hospital I would not dramatically fail the exams. Yet I couldn’t maintain any balance or focus. In the exam room, I instantly broke down, realizing it was more severe than my prior concussions. The rest of the appointment consisted of me failing test after test, and with each failed test, more fear surged throughout my body. 

Although I was advised to drop out for the semester or drop at least half my classes, I attended school a week later. I refused to let anyone or anything get in my way of graduating in four years with 150 credits. Despite not remembering anything from the first four weeks of school, struggling to recognize new friends, and dealing with a stutter and slur, I attended a reduced schedule and earned a 4.0 with the support of my incredible friends and professors. 

On December 3rd, 2018, I was cleared to start running for two minutes at a time. I was so excited! I re-earned the freedom to run again! With my background, you can imagine that being injured is like having my identity and freedom stolen away from me, so this day was a huge milestone. I texted my friends and family, so excited for the future and proud of myself for all the work I put into healing while in school. I was optimistic I would be back to training without limitations soon! It was such a relief.

Unfortunately, on my way back home from PT, I was hit head on in a Lyft car by a driver who was suspected of being high. Luckily, my trauma from the last car accident influenced me to always scan the environment no matter who is driving, so I saw the accident coming right before the impact and I braced myself to avoid hitting my head again. Upon impact, sharp pain cut through my hip, gut, back, and neck; pain I had never experienced in my life. At the scene, Lauren Carlos, who is now my best friend, skipped her class to take me to Urgent Care and comfort me. Once safely home, it was clear this accident put me back at square one in my recovery, as well as put so much fear into my mind that I refused to get into a car the next day.

Fast forward to now, I am still recovering from all my injuries, learning to deal with anxiety and PTSD while in a car, and I have almost finished my college career. Despite the brain trauma and long recovery, I am in the top 10% of students at my University, earned multiple academic awards, competed on the University accounting team, and accepted a full time job post-graduation. All that success didn’t go without the countless panic attacks, mental breakdowns, and angry and frustrating moments of not having the physical freedom to do what I want due to events I had no control over. I am still fighting to make a full recovery, yet I know I will make it, just like how I overcame the odds as a young child with my knees. I can now run 7 miles, hold an inverted position for one minute, and lift 95 pounds before my symptoms start. Through this journey, I have learned it is important to find ways to stay active each day for my own happiness, to take rest days especially when my body is communicating to me it needs to, and to make more time for loved ones; especially my parents who constantly supported and loved me, even when I unfairly took my pain out on them. No matter the pain and suffering you may endure, remember this, there are always blessings and lessons that arise out of those tears. Through my latest recovery, I discovered I may not be able to compete, but I can be a student of the sport/industry and coach others. Additionally, I had new people come into my life who I know will be with me forever, such as the new best friends I gained after the accidents, Megan Elling and Lauren Carlos. Stay resilient, appreciate the many blessings bestowed upon you, and take the opportunity to grow and become stronger than before. As your coach, I am here to help you in that process. From fitness, nutrition, mental strength, to injuries, I am here.